50 Best Funny Minion Quotes

There is a new trend in minions on the internet. Whatever the topic, these memes of minions will be popular. Here are some hilarious minion quotes! Minions are cute and funny, both in appearance and in action. Because of their adorableness, minions are part of every day life. People love to laugh at the best minions jokes and quotes. These hilarious quotes about minions will make you smile!

Best Funny Minion Quotes

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1. “Things to do today: 1. Get up. 2. Survive. 3. Go back to bed.”

2. “I hate it when people are at your house and ask ‘Do you have a bathroom?’ No, we pee in the yard.”

3. “Alcohol does not make you fat it makes you lean… Against tables, chairs, floors, walls, and ugly people.”

50 Best Funny Minion Quotes 1

4. “My Saturday was going pretty well until I realized it was Sunday.”

5. “OMG! I almost went to the toilet without my phone!”

6. “The best feeling is waking up in the middle of the night and realizing you still have hours to sleep.”

7. “There should be an app so you can delete your number out of other people’s phones.”

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8. “The best thing about me… I’m a limited edition. There are no copies of this book! Bet you’re thinking thank the good lord!”

9. “I hate it when you have to be nice to someone you really want to throw a brick at.”

10. “Friends come and go, like the waves of the ocean, but the true ones stay, like an octopus on your face.”

11. “I am one step away from being rich, all I need now is money.”

12. “I don’t like to think before I speak. I like to be just as surprised as everyone else about what comes out of my mouth.”

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13. “Love me and I’ll move mountains to make you happy. Hurt me and I’ll drop those mountains on your head”

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14. “If a bra is an “over the shoulder boulder holder” then what would you call the men’s underwear? Under the butt nut hut?”

15. “Never sing in the shower singing leads to dancing, dancing leads to slipping and slipping leads to paramedics seeing you naked, so remember don’t sing”

16. “Don’t give me your attitude unless you want mine!!”

17. “My tolerance level is extremely low proceed with caution!”

18. “You know you’re getting old when you feel bad in the morning without having had any fun the night before!”

19. “Warning! “Warning! Monday is fast approaching. There is no cure. Just drink plenty of alcohol on Sunday night to ease the pain!”

20. “Every day at work I wonder if this is going to be the day I accidentally scream: “Shut the F*ck up” out loud instead of just in my head.”

21. “Life is all about ass. You’re either covering it, laughing it off, kissing it, kicking it busting it, trying to get a piece of it behaving like one… Or, you live with one!!!”

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22. “Respect your parents. They passed school without Google!”

23. “I might look like I’m doing nothing but in my head, I’m quite busy.”

24. “Don’t worry about getting older. You still get to do stupid things, only slower.”

25. “I love my six-pack so much, I protect it with a layer of fat.”

26. “There’s no better feeling than going to bed at night and not having to set an alarm for tomorrow morning.”

27. “Heck, yes, I’m short god only lets things grow until they’re perfect some of us didn’t take as long as others.”

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28. “If God shuts a door, quit banging on it! Whether it was behind it, wasn’t meant for you. Consider the fact that maybe he closed that door because he knew you were worth so much more.”

29. “The best thing about me… I’m a limited edition. There are no other copies. Bet you’re thinking thank the good lord!” #funny minions quotes about life

30. “Most people are lucky they can’t hear what I’m thinking.”

31. “Take life day by day and be grateful for all little things. Don’t get stressed over what you can’t control.”

32. “Have you ever noticed that in every group of friends, the shortest one is usually the craziest.”

33. “Happy Friday!!”

34 “I’m with stupid” Do you have any? If people ask you

35 “I was going to do something, then I got distracted for 5 seconds and forgot.”

36 “My 4 moods: I’m too old for this shit. I’m too tired for this shit. I’m too sober for this shit. I don’t have time for this shit!” 37. “They say money talks, but mine just waves goodbye.”

38. “When life knocks you down… Calmly get back up and very politely say, “You hit like a bitch”

39. “Top 4 whishes: 1. To earn money by working 2. To be intelligent without learning 3. To love and not be hurt. 4. To eat without getting fat.”

40 “Don’t wait until you are rich to be happy. Happy is free.”

41 “My doctor asked me if I had ever had a stress test? Yes – I replied it’s called life”

42 “Do you think regular dogs see police dogs and think…. Oh shit it’s the cops!”

43 “Anyone can make you smile, many people can make you cry, but it takes someone really special to make you smile with tears in your eyes…”

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44 “One of the best feelings in the world is knowing that someone is happy because of you.”

45 “Wi-fi went down for five minutes, so it had to talk to my family. They seem like nice people.”

46 “My mother always told me if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all… and some people wonder why I’m so quiet around them!”

47 “Of course women don’t work as hard as men… They get it right the first time.”

48 “A pet. My dog is family!”

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49 “Don’t underestimate me because I’m quiet. I know more than I say, think more than I speak and I observe more than you know.”

50. “If I manage to survive the rest of the week, I would like my straight jacket in hot pink & my helmet to sparkle.”

FunnySayings and quotes about Minions| Funny minion Images

It will make you lean

My Saturday was going

OMG, I’m almost there

The best feelings

You can delete

The best think about me…

Do something nice for someone.

Friends come and go

Get out of your misery

You will be equally surprised

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The shoulder

Never sing in the bathroom.

Don’t give me your attitude

Extremely low proceed

Feeling good is the best feeling.

Virus Monday is rapidly approaching

Every day at work

The best thing about life is to live it!

Respect your parents

But in my get

Don’t worry about getting

My so much I love her

Night-time betting

God can only allow things to happen

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